Have you ever gone to the grocery store and then, when you get back home, realized what a blessing going to the grocery store is? Not just going there but being able to BUY food? This happened to me yesterday. We did our month of shopping at PriceSmart (like Sam’s Club in the States and Makro in South Africa) and our cupboard and freezer are bursting at the seams! I know for some of you who are reading this, this is really no big deal. But, for us, this is an amazing testament of God’s goodness to us! Let me back up and tell you why!
When we lived in South Africa, we were always under-supported. So much so that we struggled every month to make ends meet. We were really blessed that we lived on the OM base and could take food from the students’ kitchen, so we never went without. There were always Corn Flakes, Rice Krispies, eggs, bread, cheese, etc… Without that, we would not have had food. It was a real struggle.
Then, we were in Costa Rica last year for language school. This was what I might call our financial rock bottom. We experienced the recession in a different way. Because of the recession hitting our hometown of Kokomo, Indiana so hard, our support dropped dramatically. For example, in May last year, once all the deductions had been made, we received $369 to live on. For the month. This was when we realized we probably need to head back to the States to raise support. A heart-breaking decision to say the least.
We headed home to Indiana in June, after pulling out of language school early and changing our plans for coming to Panama. This was probably one of the most difficult times we have experienced as missionaries. There was a whole slew of emotions involved in this monumental decision. Sadness: for having to change our life plans. Embarrassment: because to some people it looked like we just “couldn’t stay on the mission field”. Guilt: for dragging our kids through this country-hopping and uncertainty. Confusion: because maybe God is trying to teach us something or re-direct our path? We really started to doubt a lot about what we knew God was telling us. It was just a time of difficulty for us.
After spending 8 months in Indiana raising support, we really saw God provide in amazing ways and through His amazing people. While it was a difficult time in our lives and ministry, it was also an amazing time of being humbled so that God could be lifted up in us and through us. We met our goal of monthly support, as well as one-time gifts needed for setting up once we arrived in Panama.
So, now we have been here for 5 weeks and are just in awe. We received our first month’s support yesterday and were able to buy food. Enough for the whole month! How amazing is that? We really serve an awesome God. What a humbling reminder of how small we are but how much He loves and cares for us anyway!
